Help Keep Trussville Beautiful!

Dear Lanetta-

I guess it has to get cold in the South sometimes. So, what am I supposed to wear on that chilly walk from the locker room to the bubble over the pool at the YMCA? They want you to shower before you get in the pool but then you gotta walk outside? And I don’t want to look stupid. Help.

Sincerely,

Frosty in Trussville

 

Dear Frosty in Trussville,

Thanks to your dumb question, Lanetta has a big ole shiver running down her back just thinking about your pasty self walking around half nekid in a public forem.

For starters…STOP BEING STUPID and quit walkin around with your nekid self. If there is one thing Lanetta hates, it’s goin to the jimnasym and having to look at ugly nekid people. AND let me ask you…why is it always the ugly people who walk around the locker room exposin parts that only doctors and bad Friday night hook ups should have to witness. That mirrer in your baferoom aint a fun house mirrer. Sweetie…you ugly nekid people really do look like a big ole tube of Crest tooth paste squeezed from the bottom up…A sticky bloated mess!

Lanetta has somethin else to add to this already disgustin subject matter. Please all you ugly people refrain from comin up and talkin to me while your standin there butt nekid. I don’t won’t to see your nasties while you gum off about your sad paythetic life. If you are nekid, then keep on walking, cause Lanetta has a rule. I DON’T TALK TO NO ONE WHO AINT WEARING NOTHIN BUT FLIP FLOPS!

As for you Frosty the SHOW MAN…You need to thumpty thump thump to your nearest Wal-Marts and invest in a bathobe. A nice velour one ought to keep your shrinkage to a minamum and spare the public the traumer of havin to see you streak to the divin board. KEEP them clothes on and no doubt, you will help KEEP TRUSSVILLE BEAUTIFUL!

Be Blessed,

Lanetta

 

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